Former columnist for the Los Angeles Post Examiner, the Baltimore Post Examiner, and Gatehouse News Service

Monday, April 18, 2011

Helicopter Parent Quiz

 Are You A Helicopter Parent?  Take This Helpful Quiz!
 You have heard of them - or, God forbid, you are one - a "Helicopter Parent."  Somehow, somewhere along the line you forgot to losen the reins a little bit, and are now living for, and through, your kid.  If you are a helicopter parent, "date night" vanished years ago (your choice) and you are darn proud of it.   So, I have developed this helpful helicopter quiz to let you check and see if you are A-OK, or in need of an umbilical-cord snip...stat!  Ready?  Here goes!


1.You are a Helicopter Parent If... you are still cutting up your kid's french toast - and you have to drive to his college cafeteria to do it.

2.  You are a Helicopter Parent If...instead of you calling your kid in sick to school, the school calls itself in sick...to you.

3.  You are a helicopter parent if...you carry glue sticks in your purse or pockets like other people carry car keys.  You are always a gummy mess, sticking to everything (like that wine glass you can't ever seem to let go of!)

4.  You are a Helicopter Parent If...You have a child-therapist, Sylvan Learning Center, and the guidance counselor on speed-dial.  Because your kid made a "fart-noise" in school.  And other kids laughed.  And the teacher growled.  And the teacher has to like you, or you'll just...I don't know...you'll just die!

5. You are a Helicopter Parent If...You catch yourself cancelling your vacation to Mexico because "our" solar system project is due that following Monday.  You'll be much too busy Googling the solar system while your cherub lays on the flloor and plays video games!

6.  You are a Helicopter Parent If...the referee in your kid's game calls a penalty...on you.  Apparently it can't be possible for your kid to need his sweatshirt and a drink of water while he's also catching a pass from his teammate.

7.  You are a Helicopter Parent If...you have a tent set up down at the mailbox to be the first to see whether "we" got into that Ivy League college or university.  You should; that was a darn good essay you wrote...ooops!

8.  You are a Helicopter Parent If...you can't realize that with kids, sometimes the view is better the farther away you are.  That's the only way to see all the confidence and self-esteem that is growing in the space you have allowed around them.

How did you score?  Be the helicopter that flies away - back to your own life.  Have some fun, and your kids will, too!

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